etherical_angel (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
etherical_angel) wrote2022-11-14 03:20 am
etherical_angel) wrote2022-11-14 03:20 am
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10 minutes away from 3am.
i havent been staying up late as often as i used to, but lately i've fell back into it. perhaps the new job adding a foreign source of routine is causing my brain to get urges to rebel again. who knows....i guess it's my responsibility to find out though.
journaling on here is much different from what im used to(tumblr mobiles smaller layout)(this one is a bit pressuring with its size). journaling on here feels like theres an expected professionalism, so i'll have to force myself to get used to it(this isnt a school assignment, theres no marks, nobodies grading you....). i have a couple of peoples substack journals bookmarked, the lengthy rambling sense of them activating my inspiration like an ingrained envious sleeper agent, but never really leading to anything(public, anyway)(here i am now i guess).
exactly 3am now.
my private tumblr is like an archive of a human brain, mix of teen girl diary entries and psych course papers, as well as a scrapbook of images desperately trying to form together to create a picture of ones identity(but forever adding more pieces). i do hope to make use of it someday. like picking pieces to edit into poems(some people say that poems can also be essays with rhythmical formatting. lucky me). i actually came across a website (either yesterday or several days ago) that takes submissions for literature from 'weirdos', created by a youtuber who's essay videos got fortunately graced by the youtube god algorithm. the site seems trustworthy based on the content of her videos.
10 minutes after 3am.
20 minutes of writing felt like nothing. has it really been that long? what have i been doing this whole time? i know i havent looked at any social media, nor have i watched any videos....did i zone out? or am i just a slow typer?(i got 46 words per minute earlier today when i took the test for the first time, which i dont think is too bad...maybe).
i was going to write about fixing my lifestyle, organizing it neatly in this little word container, promising to edit it in the future as i put the thoughts and theories into motion. having a place to put it instead of just leaving it to be lost in my vent blog(not true, i tag everything, but who's to say i'll actually check the tags <<). i've attempted it so many times in the past, different methods, different wording, bare minimum of expected effort, never successfully finding the sweet spot of productivity that ends up sticking.
20 minutes after 3am.
i havent been staying up late as often as i used to, but lately i've fell back into it. perhaps the new job adding a foreign source of routine is causing my brain to get urges to rebel again. who knows....i guess it's my responsibility to find out though.
journaling on here is much different from what im used to(tumblr mobiles smaller layout)(this one is a bit pressuring with its size). journaling on here feels like theres an expected professionalism, so i'll have to force myself to get used to it(this isnt a school assignment, theres no marks, nobodies grading you....). i have a couple of peoples substack journals bookmarked, the lengthy rambling sense of them activating my inspiration like an ingrained envious sleeper agent, but never really leading to anything(public, anyway)(here i am now i guess).
exactly 3am now.
my private tumblr is like an archive of a human brain, mix of teen girl diary entries and psych course papers, as well as a scrapbook of images desperately trying to form together to create a picture of ones identity(but forever adding more pieces). i do hope to make use of it someday. like picking pieces to edit into poems(some people say that poems can also be essays with rhythmical formatting. lucky me). i actually came across a website (either yesterday or several days ago) that takes submissions for literature from 'weirdos', created by a youtuber who's essay videos got fortunately graced by the youtube god algorithm. the site seems trustworthy based on the content of her videos.
10 minutes after 3am.
20 minutes of writing felt like nothing. has it really been that long? what have i been doing this whole time? i know i havent looked at any social media, nor have i watched any videos....did i zone out? or am i just a slow typer?(i got 46 words per minute earlier today when i took the test for the first time, which i dont think is too bad...maybe).
i was going to write about fixing my lifestyle, organizing it neatly in this little word container, promising to edit it in the future as i put the thoughts and theories into motion. having a place to put it instead of just leaving it to be lost in my vent blog(not true, i tag everything, but who's to say i'll actually check the tags <<). i've attempted it so many times in the past, different methods, different wording, bare minimum of expected effort, never successfully finding the sweet spot of productivity that ends up sticking.
20 minutes after 3am.